unburdened
It feels like nothing is and it's everything I've been. The radio isn't friendly with the cop out thin line of friends and strangers not so very fine. The feeling I understand of what's going on leads to how I am no more. I am a lost cause to myself, others, and to this blog. So this is how it'll be. Wrapped in tin foil. Not to spoil.
Although I must say this whole understanding that dates way back when... gives me a way to explain the strange ways people behave when talking about these hidden issues. I think there are basically a couple kinds of people. One group wants to believe in a world where miraculous things can happen. This belief inspires them and moves them and makes them feel like their life has meaning. They feel attacked by the other group, who doesn't feel the need to believe in things for which there is no evidence, or even for which there is evidence to the contrary. Of course, the second group feels put upon by the first group because they just can't imagine making any kind of decisions based on beliefs which are demonstrably false.
Both groups are right. People will be less likely to feel attacked if they're allowed to believe whatever they want to believe, and they'll be less likely to be attacked if they don't insist on suggesting their particular beliefs make good public policy.
People can sometimes resent scientists for "taking the magic out of the world" for centuries. It's no difference today, but somehow we've gotten the idea that it's not ok to hold irrational beliefs because they make us feel better. People have been made to feel ashamed of their beliefs and have responded by concocting things to justify themselves.
But let's not lose the plot here: the most important thing for some people is to continue to believe the things that make them feel better. It used to be that you could believe whatever you wanted to, but still function as a good public servant, and no one made you feel silly or challenged your right to sit on a school board because you could keep things separate. Scientific theories were best for science class, evidence(or, at least anectdote) based policy was best for public decisions.
How do we get back to that? How do we do the opposite of what happens in the middle east and tears whole societies apart? Well, first, we have to make sure everyone has permission to believe whatever they want, without being ridiculed or threatened. Then we have to make sure that decisions about the world are based upon sound evidence.
That's the route to consilience. The other way leads to madness and the truth... of ourselves.
If I'm to find myself in the near future reminiscing about last night's trip to the cafe and how much time I spent in some character, as opposed to the strip of carbon-copy, boringly and predictable populate surrounding me, maybe I'll blog about it.
Years ago it would have been impossible to envision a massive amount of time spent in waste in front of screen continuously typing what is now a undeniable loss in my minds own bewilderment, and while those who visit have still no clue as to what I am or once was, quite a few of us that have lived a considerable amount of time recognizing that we have become side from a few considerable things something almost diametrically opposed to our former selves.
May the grit and diversity, all but memories now, be swallowed up by the boring unoriginality that has gripped this poor native son. In many ways, I feel I have become one-dimensional, a playpen for the ever-expanding monotone of those who climb ladders constructed of low self-esteem away from real potential opportunism in self-realization and self-standing. I am a stranger to myself and alone in this phenomenon of mine.
Holding the phone, I look out my bedroom window, conversation diverting to the progress of my departure into a dead star. How are things going? I'm asked. I stood there, prisoner to a moment of extreme sadness, one that can only be described as the recognition of something special forever lost. It is a terrible conclusion to come about and even more so to convey in words. But there it is. Here I am.
Although I must say this whole understanding that dates way back when... gives me a way to explain the strange ways people behave when talking about these hidden issues. I think there are basically a couple kinds of people. One group wants to believe in a world where miraculous things can happen. This belief inspires them and moves them and makes them feel like their life has meaning. They feel attacked by the other group, who doesn't feel the need to believe in things for which there is no evidence, or even for which there is evidence to the contrary. Of course, the second group feels put upon by the first group because they just can't imagine making any kind of decisions based on beliefs which are demonstrably false.
Both groups are right. People will be less likely to feel attacked if they're allowed to believe whatever they want to believe, and they'll be less likely to be attacked if they don't insist on suggesting their particular beliefs make good public policy.
People can sometimes resent scientists for "taking the magic out of the world" for centuries. It's no difference today, but somehow we've gotten the idea that it's not ok to hold irrational beliefs because they make us feel better. People have been made to feel ashamed of their beliefs and have responded by concocting things to justify themselves.
But let's not lose the plot here: the most important thing for some people is to continue to believe the things that make them feel better. It used to be that you could believe whatever you wanted to, but still function as a good public servant, and no one made you feel silly or challenged your right to sit on a school board because you could keep things separate. Scientific theories were best for science class, evidence(or, at least anectdote) based policy was best for public decisions.
How do we get back to that? How do we do the opposite of what happens in the middle east and tears whole societies apart? Well, first, we have to make sure everyone has permission to believe whatever they want, without being ridiculed or threatened. Then we have to make sure that decisions about the world are based upon sound evidence.
That's the route to consilience. The other way leads to madness and the truth... of ourselves.
If I'm to find myself in the near future reminiscing about last night's trip to the cafe and how much time I spent in some character, as opposed to the strip of carbon-copy, boringly and predictable populate surrounding me, maybe I'll blog about it.
Years ago it would have been impossible to envision a massive amount of time spent in waste in front of screen continuously typing what is now a undeniable loss in my minds own bewilderment, and while those who visit have still no clue as to what I am or once was, quite a few of us that have lived a considerable amount of time recognizing that we have become side from a few considerable things something almost diametrically opposed to our former selves.
May the grit and diversity, all but memories now, be swallowed up by the boring unoriginality that has gripped this poor native son. In many ways, I feel I have become one-dimensional, a playpen for the ever-expanding monotone of those who climb ladders constructed of low self-esteem away from real potential opportunism in self-realization and self-standing. I am a stranger to myself and alone in this phenomenon of mine.
Holding the phone, I look out my bedroom window, conversation diverting to the progress of my departure into a dead star. How are things going? I'm asked. I stood there, prisoner to a moment of extreme sadness, one that can only be described as the recognition of something special forever lost. It is a terrible conclusion to come about and even more so to convey in words. But there it is. Here I am.
posted by daneatkinson at 31.8.06
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