adventure land

If I was a surgeon I would tell patients this before surgery: 'Whatever you do, don't go into the light...'

My eye glasses have met their demise, so now I'm half blind until my finances pick up. As I shrug my shoulders I find there’s only so much of your life you can take. I need one of those so called holidays, you know? So, then I hear thanksgivings day is coming and I say, "Sometimes there just aren’t enough hours in the day."

I used to hear my mother say that and think to myself, "What the heck is she talking about? There are exactly the right amount of hours. In fact, sometimes there are too many, like when I’m stuck inside on a rainy Saturday afternoon…"

But things are different these days—or rather, I’m different, these days—and I find that phrase ringing through my head more and more. Like right now, for instance, as I rush to write this down.

"Are you ready?" it would poke my head and ask.

"One second…" I'd reply.

Symbolically I feel like I'm going to hell because something tells me that the Dept is the hardest and busiest place in the whole network and there's no way will I survive it and no way would I ever have time to think let alone blog and frankly, my head says I can't hack it. So what did I do? I blogged and went off to another meeting for another unlikely business venture with a dreams that are bigger than I am. I'll show you, cracker!

Of all things, I used to like Adventure Land the best. I used to like the Indiana Jones ride. It was the best because waiting in line is almost better than the ride itself. Funny how that works. I waited in line to get on that ride for almost two hours once. The ride itself isn't even a minute long. It was kind of like a date. I didn't have enough money to get one of those cool muskets though. To be honest, they seemed a whole lot cooler when I was 9. If I tried it again, now it would just seem like a waste of money. Funny how that works. Someone should tell the NRA that they've grown up. Maybe their muskets won't seem so cool anymore.

Even though Disney Land is the happiest place on earth they're a lot of lost kids wandering around. When I go out most of the time I get lost for about an hour. I 'm never very happy. When I was younger, my mother dropped an entire tray of spaghetti dinners in a restaurant and just ran off looking for me. It scarred her for life. Come to think of it, Disney Land is kind of like a miniature version of the world that you have to pay to get into. You have to pay during your time there too. Unlike the real world, you don't have to pay to leave. Funny how that works. You just keep paying and coming back for more. If God does work in mysterious ways he must work at Disney Land I figure. There are a lot of lost kids wandering around with muskets. I wonder if he knows? I must confess that I once went to Wonderland for a couple days. It's the Canadian knock-off of Disneyland. It rained most of the time. All the lost kids got wet and their muskets wouldn't fire.

I was just dreaming there for a minute.

I also heard that they changed Snow White's dress. There are people at Disney Land that dress up like famous characters and walk around hugging the lost kids. Sometimes their muskets go off by accident. One guy even grabbed Snow White's breasts, so they changed her costume so her tits wouldn't stick out as much. I heard that she married the guy that grabbed her. They live in Fantasy Land now, next to Mr. Toad's Wild Ride. I guess now she grabs him back. Maybe they'll have some lost kids. Maybe they'll find them. Hey, there Rabbit. He says hi.